This website has been years in the making, mostly because I have a full time job as a corporate and securities lawyer, or at least that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. You can read about my story on the About page of this website but I think it is appropriate to properly introduce myself and calmmother.com.
The purpose of this website is to simplify the lives of mothers. We provide information about managing pregnancy, delivery and life as a mother in a practical and concise manner. This is not to say that being a mother can be made easy, just easier. We know you are busy and that there are methods conducive to helping you establish and maintain balance in your life, even with a newborn - we want to help you get there!
Most women I know do not have the time or desire to read a number of books about pregnancy, childbirth and babies, etc. And frankly, it can get a bit old after the first few chapters, especially if the entire book is about sleep training. From the time my husband and I started thinking about starting a family, I searched for a prescriptive guide to help answer all of the questions I had, especially the ones I was too embarrassed to ask my doctor. But, I didn't find a suitable resource, mostly because none of the information that I needed was in one place.
I don't think I was asking for too much… just honest and to the point answers to my questions regarding pregnancy, delivery, self-care and baby care, and transitioning back to work as a professional. I wanted answers like the ones my best girlfriends would give if they had gone through it before me. From a medical perspective, I was interested to know the options available to me in connection with pregnancy, delivery and postpartum care for my baby and me, including natural methods (a bit of granola for the mainstream).
Perhaps more importantly, I didn't want to have to skip a beat after I had a baby if I chose not to. In particular, I intended for my entire family to get a full night of sleep as soon as possible following delivery. In truth, I practically freaked out when I heard that babies don't often sleep through the night for months or even years after they are born! This was a problem for me because I need at least eight hours of sleep each night or else I am a total grump. Even after having two babies, I have yet to master the art of functioning without sleep. Also, I knew that I would probably want to return to work shortly after my baby was born.
I was laid off when I was only a few months pregnant with my first baby - and what seemed like an unfortunate event was a blessing in disguise. Since discussing a baby bump during an interview can be an awkward conversation piece (you might want to take my word for it rather than trying it yourself), I decided to lay low for a while. Being off work gave me the opportunity to read as many resources as I needed to come up with a plan that would help make things as manageable as possible for me during this new, exciting and somewhat stressful, life changing adventure. I wanted the time to enjoy being a mother!
After the birth of my first child, simplifying my life as much as possible became a necessity due to my family circumstances. I returned to work full time three months after the birth of my first baby by choice, at which point my baby was sleeping through the night between 10 and 12 hours (and had been sleeping eight or more hours each night since eight weeks old) thanks to the Calmmother feeding and sleep program. To say that things were hectic when I returned to work would be understating it. First, I exclusively fed my baby expressed breastmilk, which I pumped throughout the day in the privacy of my office. Second, the legal department I was a part of was short two lawyers for the first year after I returned to work. Finally, my husband was working full time while completing an MBA that year.
I became pregnant with my second child a few years later, about two weeks after my husband was diagnosed with testicular cancer. Honestly, we didn't know if we would be able to have kids after he finished treatment and two surgeries, so we figured we didn't have much to lose by trying! I went back to work when my youngest was seven months old and my husband was in good health. My second baby had the exact same feeding and sleep patterns as my first, which I attribute entirely to the Calmmother feeding and sleep program.
After consistently sleeping through the night when each of my babies was only 12 weeks old, and hearing the success stories of other mothers who have used the Calmmother feeding and sleep program or similar schedules, I am convinced that we can help pave the way for women to have it all, guilt free. What "having it all" looks like will be different for every woman - it may include time for yourself, a healthy family life and a successful career should you so desire. Regardless of what it means to you, we celebrate diversity among women and our methods are meant to help all mothers!
Calmmother Method is based on my experiences as well as those of the mothers I have had the pleasure of sharing stories with. As time goes on, I expect that this website will offer a variety of helpful resources about topics that matter to women. I would like to thank all of the amazing women that have contributed to this website so far, your support is appreciated and your willingness to help other women is inspirational.
I am constantly trying to maintain balance in my life, and it is my sincere hope that we are able to help you achieve a sense of balance in yours. The peace in me recognizes and honours the peace in you - thank you for sharing this journey with me!